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Assignment #1, Formal Letter

Subject: Self-introduction letter from Erwin

 Dear Professor Blackstone, 

I am writing to you to introduce myself so that you can get to know me better. My name is Erwin Leow, a civil engineering student at the Singapore Institute of Technology. I will be taking your effective communication class this trimester.

I graduated with a diploma in aerospace electronics from Temasek Polytechnic but made the decision to pursue civil engineering instead as it will provide me with a wider variety of job opportunities in the future. I decided to still continue in the engineering sector due to my love for mathematics.

A communication strength that I believe I possess is the ability to find common topics of discussion with people. I will still be able to still strike a conversation even when the other party has conflicting or different interests. On the other hand, a communication weakness I have is that I am shy. Although I can talk well with people, I tend to find it hard to approach them at first. Even after mustering the courage, I would sometimes be very awkward with them as I feel slightly nervous talking to someone for the first time.

My goal for this module is that I would like to boost my social skills. I would like to be more comfortable talking to new people so that I can overcome the awkward barrier as I meet people in the industry in the future. Another goal in this module is to be able to talk to a large group of people without freezing up.

Lastly, one thing I find that sets me apart from others is my discipline and ability to stick to a routine. I can go months and years with a particular routine I've set to follow without fail. I look forward to attending your classes for the rest of the trimester.

Best regards,

Erwin Leow





 

Comments

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dear Erwin,

    I really enjoyed reading your introduction letter. It enabled me to learn more about your strength and weakness when it comes to communication. Your letter is clear and concise, which makes it easier to understand. The tone of the letter is appropriate.

    There are a few things which I would like to point out:
    - In the 2nd line of your 3rd paragraph, the word "still" could have been avoided as you have already mentioned it earlier.
    - In the 3rd paragraph, it is good that you have phrases like "On the other hand" when talking about different points
    - You could have briefly mentioned about how your strength and weakness have affected you using your past experiences

    I hope to work with you in class!

    Regards,
    Praveen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Praveen,

      Thank you for your constructive feedback. I will carefully look into and correct the errors you have pointed out.

      Regards,
      Erwin

      Delete
  3. Dear Erwin,

    You letter was really clear and concise, i was able to learn more about you from this letter.

    - On the 3rd paragraph, you mention that you are able to talk well with people, i feel that perhaps another choice of word such as converse could be use to improve the sentence

    I am looking forward to working together in class

    Regards,
    Tan Yao Shen (Alson)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Alson,

      Thank you for your constructive feedback. I will carefully look into and correct the errors you have pointed out.

      Regards,
      Erwin

      Delete
  4. Dear Erwin,

    Your letter is straightforward and clear, I could easily understand where you were coming from when you described about yourself in the letter. Great job! However, a few things to take note, try to work on your sentence structure by adding in more connectors like "and, or, in addition, etc." Overall, I enjoyed reading your letter and hope to know you better! Looking forward to seeing you in class!

    With regards,
    Gabriel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Gabriel,

      Thank you for your constructive feedback. I will carefully look into and correct the errors you have pointed out.

      Regards,
      Erwin

      Delete
  5. Dear Erwin,

    Thank you for this clear, cpncise letter. You've basically covered the scope of the assignment brief, and we learn a bit about you in the process. For starters, we learn that you enjoy math and that this passion for the subject has motivated you to study engineering. I'm curious abou the genesis of that interest. Did it begin in primary school? How? Did any teacher or relative inspire you? Explaining these points would give more depth to the content.

    You do openl share about your shyness. That is certainly not a bad thing, but I would liketo see you express yourself more in class, with you inching out of your comfort zone, so to speak.

    One strength that I see in this letter is that your language skills are top-notch. I look forward to reading more of your writing this term.

    Best wishes,

    Brad

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Prof Blackstone,

      Thank you for your feedback. I will take your pointers into consideration and will make sure to include them in my second draft.

      I hope to be able to improve on my weaknesses through this trimester in your class.

      Regards,
      Erwin

      Delete

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